I have been brought up in a god fearing family and grown up seeing parents and grandparents perform the daily ritual of performing pooja and reciting mantras. My father,a strong believer in God, has always been very certain that all that he has achieved till date has been only due to the divine intervention and all the not so good things are meant for lessons we need to learn as we tread on the path to a greater good. In the grand scheme of things that only He knows we often fail to take time off to reflect on the learnings when we are facing obstacles. It is only natural that my father's philosophy has become a part of my system as well. At this stage in life I am quite comfortable with the fact that there is some divine force quite like a guarding angel that is constantly accompanying me.
Things were not so in my growing up years. In the early schooling years of my life I was at a stage where I was simply observing things happening around me rarely questioning or reasoning the logic. I remember reciting the prayers just as I would recite a peom that has been learnt at school but not really delving into the meaning or the reason. In the growing up phase there were several conflicts in my mind as to what it feels to be religious and to pray with the same fervour as I had seen my father do. Despite this I never even once been convinced of the non existence of God. It was rather that I was waiting for something to happen that would cement my trust in him.
That was back then. Now my belief in Him is only getting stronger by the day. Between then and now, there have been many instances that have lead me to think differently...things that may not even have a plausible scientific explaination. One such time was when I was pregnant. During my entire nine months of pregnancy I have never once felt that I was carrying a girl child. It was just as if I just knew I was going to have a baby boy as if my intuition was a sign from Him. And so it was.
All of us have our own interpretations of God. To me these days He is my constant companion with whom I have daily conversations.
i agree with you. keeping the faith is the easiest n the simplest thing you can do to survive in this crazy world. i remeber when i was a kid, i used to believe in god firmly. as i started to grow up, i started to doubt his existance. after that, there has been these phases - yes, i believe in him....no, he doesn't exist. and i can surely tell you i feel more peaceful when i am into the first phase.
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